Do you feel drained out after having a conversation with some set of people? Is anyone taking advantage of your soft-mindedness and leaving you overwhelmed and exhausted after every conversation? If the above sounds familiar to you, you might be dealing with energy vampires. These are certain people who come into our lives and intentionally and emotionally hurt our feelings. They know how to take advantage of our ability to listen to them. So, their only aim is to leave you all drained out that you have little or no strength to do your things.
Do not be surprised to find this set of people among your friends, family members, colleagues, pastor, prophets, even spouse. Discovering them can be a difficult task. Ask God for the spirit of discernment, so you will recognize them and learn how to handle them. And when you finally discover them, you will be able to preserve energy and protect yourself from emotional burnout.
Here Are Some Of Their Characteristics
- Energy vampires never take responsibility
Energy vampires are often charming. They are very cunning and know when and how to move away when there is trouble. This set of people never accept their fault, rather they look for a way to blame others for their mischief. They are very crafty and will always leave their victim with guilt and blame.
Hear how they talk:
- Everyone is blaming me?
- What have I done this time?
- And why is everyone angry with me as if I am the only bad person?
2. They are always dramatic
Energy vampires are always dramatic. They always get into emotional drama. The only thing they know is catastrophic and, they target you to rescue and solve their problems. They see you as a fixing machine.
Hear their words of defense:
- Why is everyone mad at me.
- I can’t take this anymore and, I feel like giving up.
3. They are envious
Energy vampires are jealous. They will never want you to outshine them. They are very cunning in their ways and always pretend to be happy and genuine. They aim to pull you down and can become so noisy just to get the spotlight.
Hear how they talk:
- Wao! I am happy for you. I got a more expensive car than yours but I will need some help to pick it up.
- Oh, you have a book. I forgot. I am also busy with one and I know mine will be more interesting.
4. They are not bothered about your feelings
Energy vampires feed on your energy. They never give you chance to share your story, rather they shift the attention to themselves. They never have time to hear your story.
Hear how they talk:
- I know you are a busy person. But please I need to discuss this issue with you.
- I was depending on you to help me start up that business, but I know how hard it is but I need your help.
- You are the only one that can help me
5. They take advantage of your good heart
Energy vampires take advantage of your compassionate heart. They are so good at using your kindness to drain you of your energy. They turn your kindness into blame if you refused to help them in achieving their goals.
Here is how they operate:
- They always ask you for a favor because they know you can’t resist them.
- They know your every move and target when to act.
6. Guilt and ultimatum is their tools
Energy vampires use guilt and ultimatum to attack their victims. They give an ultimatum to their victims to get attention. This helps their victim to quickly react to their demand. They know how passionate their victims are and the only way to get to them is to make them feel guilty if they don’t react.
Here is how they talk:
- How will I make it without you.?
- You know you are the only one I have.
- I can’t do this on my own please I will need your help.
Here is how to handle them
Energy vampires take lots of energy from their victims. So when it’s discovered and handled, it helps you overcome stress, anxiety, and depression and, burnout.
- Set boundaries
You are not obliged to agree with them all the time. Avoid their invitations and maybe even trip together. Learn to say no and stand by it. If they are at your job. Then avoid getting into personal conversations with them. Do your job and go home.
- Keep your advice
Keep away from them as much as you can. Change your expectation about them. It might be difficult, but it will be of great help to save your energy. Don’t depend on them for advice because they really have nothing to offer since everything should revolve around them.
- Protect your Peace
Know when to pick their calls. They can be so pressurizing to get your attention. Try to ignore them and save your energy. Soon they will look elsewhere for a new victim.
- Detach from them entirely
You have the freedom to choose peace or trouble. So cutting off from energy vampires is your right to claim. To the outside world, it looks selfish. But protecting your peace is all that matters if you want sanity.
In conclusion. No one deserves to be drained up for being good. So when some set of people refused to become mature and handle their responsibility, then it is time to let go of them. Their burden is not your responsibility to bear.
Please feel free to share this post with your friends and loved ones.
Remember, I’m your sister in Christ.